Adam Richard - creator/writer/star of Outland
Trials and Tribulations of Celebrity
Okay, so I went to the movies yesterday. Took my little sister, it was her birthday. Thought I'd give her the whole red carpet premiere experience, where we would rub shoulders with Jason Bateman.
The Horrible Bosses premiere at Crown. It was even mentioned in the press release that I was attending! First name on the list, like I'm some kind of super-celebrity, and people will be crowding the velvet rope to hear how excited I am to see Jennifer Aniston as nymphomaniacal dentist.
When I rocked up, an efficient publicitybot from Roadshow directed my sister and I away from the red carpet, while ushering Tania Zaetta onto it. Apparently, Zaetta's rubberised lips are chockers with opinion. As opposed to mine, which are mostly full of soldier cock.
Now, I'm happy to sit down next Andrew Gaze and his daughter and enjoy a boss-murder comedy, clap excitedly when I see Bunk and Cutty from The Wire (my sister shares my love of awesome tv shows), and eat the free popcorn. I'm even happy to write a quick two-line review. (Distractingly amusing, not the greatest comedy ever made, but an enjoyable 98 minutes of nonsense. Leads are likeable, but dwarfed by hammy turns from Spacey, Aniston and Farrell. 2.5/5).
What I'm not happy about is being sold like I'm some kind of commodity that people can come and gawk at, and then told "no, actually, we don't want anybody to know you are here, can you please sneak in the back way, you're making our movie look cheap." Sure, I've inferred most of that, and it could all be down to one useless bimbo who, rightly, doesn't think I'm famous enough to be foist before reporters. Unlike Tania Zaetta, who is extremely famous and has many jobs. Don't believe me? Go to tania.com.au She looks very busy.
*UPDATE Just spoke to Melissa Bergland from Channel 7's Winners and Losers, who also got the back door treatment from the airheads at Roadshow. She'd bought a new dress and everything!