Death in the Family
Grief. It is different for all of us. It comes in great waves of anger, remorse, melancholy, pity, regret, sadness, relief, and a thousand other emotions, each arriving in separate shades of subtlety and strength. How do you support someone through the loss of a parent? It doesn't matter how old you are, or whether your loved one is taken suddenly or slowly, it is a loss from which you never truly recover.
I lost my mother on Boxing Day 1996, and every year, when the Christmas decorations go up, I become eight kinds of odd. Irrational, effusive, unnecessarily angry, inexplicably manic, morose, and morbid. I don't even know why it's happening, half of the time. I'm not really aware of it until I stand back, take a look at my behaviour, and ask: "Why am I behaving like Kylie Minogue in 'The Delinquents?' Like I don't know how to act?"
My beautiful boyfriend has recently lost a member of his family, and I don't know how to help him. Just by being there, I guess. People helped me through my grief, I don't know how, but they did, and now it is time to pass that love and support on to someone else.
If you are arguing with your lover, mother, father, brother, sister, son or daughter right now, take a moment to wonder what your life would be if they were taken from you. Stop arguing, go give them a hug and tell them you love them. Our days together are precious. Don't waste them.